These 20 questions allow us to evaluate ourselves to see if Nar-Anon might be right for us.
Ask yourself the following questions and then answer them as honestly as you can.
- Do you find yourself making excuses, lying or covering up for someone?
- Do you have a reason not to trust this person?
- Is it becoming difficult for you to believe his/her explanations?
- Do you lie awake worrying about this person?
- If it is your child, is he/she missing school often without your knowledge?
- If it is your spouse, is he/she missing work and leaving bills to pile up?
- Are your savings mysteriously disappearing?
- Are the unanswered questions causing hostility and undermining your relationship?
- Are you asking yourself, “What’s wrong?” and “Is it my fault?”
- Are normal family disagreements becoming hostile and violent?
- Are your suspicions turning you into a detective and are you afraid of what you may find?
- Are you canceling your social functions with vague excuses?
- Are you becoming increasingly reluctant to invite friends to your home?
- Is concern for this person causing you headaches, a knotty stomach and extreme anxiety?
- Do minute matters easily irritate this person? Does your whole life seem like a nightmare?
- Are you unable to discuss the situation with friends and relatives because of embarrassment?
- Are you frustrated by ineffective attempts to control the situation?
- Do you overcompensate and try not to make waves?
- Do you keep trying to make things better and nothing helps?
- Are the life style and friends of this person changing? Do you ever think they may be using drugs?
If you have answered “Yes” to four or more of these questions, Nar-Anon may be able to give you the answers you are looking for.
We welcome you to the Nar-Anon Family Groups and hope that you will find comfort and support in our meetings. We believe that by sharing our experience, strength and hope we can learn from each other how to deal with the pain and heartbreak that comes with loving an addict. This pamphlet will explain how our program works. If you have any questions, please ask them before or after the meeting.
We encourage you to attend at least six meetings before deciding if Nar-Anon is right for you. You will hear stories from our members that are similar to your own. You will find help in our literature that you can read between meetings. As you learn about our program, you will gain strength by realizing that you are not alone. There are many tools that can be used to help you during this difficult time. Not everything you hear
or read will apply to your situation, so take what you like and leave the rest.
As you work the Nar-Anon program, you will come to appreciate the widely divergent ideas that are expressed here. In Nar-Anon, as in life, we all come from different backgrounds, bringing with us our own thoughts, ideas and instincts, and we are striving to be the best individuals we can be. We learn that we can work this program in our own way and in our own time.
There are no professionals or experts in our meetings, only other members who have had to deal with the addiction problem of someone they love. No one will tell you what to do or how to do it. We can only share our experience, strength and hope so that we might learn from each other in order to make decisions that are right for us.